Standing in the middle of the junction, that is exactly what I am facing right now..Being a 24, and a fresh grad.
I was chatting with some friends, realised that most of us are currently facing: quarter-life crisis - worries about work that is rather new to us, worries about family and relationship, worries about starting a new family of our own, etc...
My current status, just so you guys know: fresh grad. single. uncertain of what future lies ahead of me.
So, I decided to talk to my dad about my quarter-life crisis too. Our conversation concludes the three reminders below:
1. Don't feel that you are useless, it's okay to have nothing right now
Things are a little different than study life, sometimes it feels stupid to make so many mistakes while working/ networking with others. We are learning everything all over again, just like a kid learns how to walk. The difference now is, we blame ourselves for being stupid or even useless for making those mistakes. Some may blame ourselves that we aren't contributing to our family, some blame for not being able to buy a house/a car for the family. Well, it's true that the current expenses is so much higher than a worker's salary.
It is okay to have nothing right now, you will figure out how to avoid mistakes, how to contribute to your love ones, how to contribute to the societies, just like a kid learns how to walk.
2. Don't rush into a relationship, it's okay to be single right now
I am fortunate to not have those kinda aunties who will ask "When are you getting a boyfriend? When are you getting married?" It is true that being alone is so much better than badly companied. However, it is also harder to be alone as the darkest thing to face is the ugly side of us. Knowing and learning the 'true' us can be tough sometimes. That is the reason why most of us find it easier to always hang out with friends and family rather than being alone most of the time. However, I realised, being alone can be cool too. I started picking up courses online, practicing writing skills (which is what I am doing now!!) ,writing songs, expanding my music circles, learning things that I have never thought of such as Chinese Tea culture, etc.
It is okay to be single right now, why not start investing in yourselves with some cool knowledge and some quality 'me' time too?
3. Don't panic, it's okay to not know what you want right now
Should I further my studies? Is that guy/girl good for me? Which work should I get? Should I quit? Should I continue this shitty job? Should I just say yes to that guy/girl? All these questions popping out as we are unsure of the outcome. We are so used to things getting planned ahead with clear aims and with predictable outcomes. Since young, we go to school, we look forward to primary school life, secondary school life, high school life..But after university, we are left with working life. That is a never ending working life, till the day we decide to retire / die. Sounds scary, huh. Working life aside, we are now unsure of what kinda future lies ahead. Marriage? Seems to good to be true to me. Work? Should I work in the field related to my studies? I don't know what I want.
It is okay to not know what you want, but you should know what you don't want. So, start making a 'no' list. You will slowly understand yourself.
Let these three reminders be a gentle, happy note for you and me during our dark days.
Call me G :)
Hi, my name is Jyi. I am the founder and engineer for JYISMUSIC! I help people produce their favourite songs/covers as well as provide services to companies like Mediacorp! Besides, music, I share things I like, such as food, travel, and some financial/investment tips I read :)
Do you have music projects you wanna discuss with me?